Allison 2,369 Posted April 18, 2015 Report Share Posted April 18, 2015 Melting Ice Caps Expose Hundreds Of Secret Arctic Lairs ZACKENBERG RESEARCH STATION, GREENLAND—Claiming it to be one of the most dramatic and visible signs of climate change to date, researchers said Monday that receding polar ice caps have revealed nearly 200 clandestine lairs once buried deep beneath hundreds of feet of Arctic ice. "We always assumed there would be some secret lairs here and there, but the sheer number now being exposed is indeed troubling," said noted climatologist Anders Lorenzen, who claimed that the Arctic ice caps have shrunk at the alarming rate of 41,000 square miles per year. "In August alone we discovered 44 mad scientist laboratories, three highly classified military compounds, and seven reanimated and very confused cavemen. That's more than twice the number we had found in the previous three decades combined." "This is no longer conjecture," Lorenzen added. "This is a full-blown crisis." According to oceanographers, the Arctic Circle has been devastated by the effects of global warming in recent years, threatening hundreds of men and women who use the frozen tundra as a place to conduct bizarre experiments in human-animal grafting, carry out massive government cover-ups, or simply as a hidden headquarters from which to battle the forces of evil and fight crime. "Last week a giant ice sheet broke off and split my prized underground complex nearly in half," said Dr. Raygun, a self-described psychotic mastermind best known for his diabolical thought-control experiments. "Now millions of dollars in state-of-the-art doomsday devices are gone—all because of the environmental carnage wrought by the human race." "You spend your whole career concocting a brilliant scheme to wipe out all of mankind, and what happens?" Dr. Raygun continued. "They bring about a major global catastrophe completely on their own, those fools!" More here. 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sherab 2,337 Posted April 18, 2015 Report Share Posted April 18, 2015 I prefer the hollowed out volcano 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
miz molly 1,800 Posted April 19, 2015 Report Share Posted April 19, 2015 My ice castles are gone. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Rik 183 Posted April 20, 2015 Report Share Posted April 20, 2015 (edited) You mean they haven't found Superman's fortress of solitude yet? Edited April 20, 2015 by Rik 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Chinatola 927 Posted April 20, 2015 Report Share Posted April 20, 2015 that's where I left my keys! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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