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Urgent Obesity Problem In Foxes


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I think there are some folks that would rather believe this about my AID than that there are AIDs....

 

Due to human encroachment that is causing shrinking fox habitat and chemtrails causing mutant overly calorically dense voles the fox population is experiencing sky rocketing incidents of obesity. A leading activist explains that foxes are no longer getting the exercise they need due to shrinking habitat. The vole problem has pushed the whole situation over the edge. Voles, mutated by evil chemicals from chemtrails have become so nutritionally dense that they are better than Elvish lembas bread. A leading researcher forgot to keep her mouth shut when working with the mutant voles and packed on 40 lbs just from breathing vole lint. So dangerous are the voles it is said that former mayor Bloomberg has been seen wondering New York City fund raisers muttering "ban voles". Fortunately concerned citizens are banding together to help these foxes. Patterned after "Lets Move" these caring citizens are volunteering to walk foxes about town, thereby expanding their territory for the purposes of exercise. "you can tell the program is working when the tail get less big". Said one volunteer. "The fox stores all the fat in it's tail, just like the gila moster. When the tail gets normal we know we've had an impact." A vole rehab clinic is being piloted in New Hampshire as part of the ACA. ACA covers vole addiction as a pre-existing condition. "We hope to get the foxes to come clean and kick the vole habit". A social worker said.

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:blink: ... da-fu?

 

 

 

lol

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I just enjoyed living this... There are bill boards in metro Houston that were like big screen TVs broadcasting the impending doom. It's really not the road conditions but the Texans that I fear. The ones in trucks, in a panic, speeding and weaving through traffic, breaking hard. My flight was delayed by 4 hours because the pilot was stuck on an overpass.

I then returned to the Hoth planet and drove home with out incident.

 

Meanwhile Daddy let Cake GROW. EEEEEEE!

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LOL

We get almost that level of panic here when there is a snow-cast. Half an inch of snow causes delayed start or closed schools.. sigh

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First time I have ever heard this one ... we now have over 100 inches of snow on the ground, it's amazing, and it's still coming down but school has been cancelled up here four times in the last two weeks because of cold weather!!!!!! Really, we live in northern Michigan, in the snow belt, and they can't go outside because it's cold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I know what you mean.

 

Being a lifelong Chicagoan we're used to 'the weather'. It's cold...very cold for a long time here during the winter. Usually when snow falls it stays around until spring because it usually doesn't get warm enough for long enough to melt it all so there are giant piles of months old snow everywhere you go and we've all grown up with this nonsense year in and year out...so we're used to it.

 

Or so I thought

 

Then. THEN.

 

Along comes 2014 and we're socked with cold...bitter arctic, bone chilling cold to go along with epic levels of snow the magnitude I haven't seen since I was a kid! They're talking like it's the end of the world! C'mon!!

 

I'm 52 so I remember the the legendary blizzard of '67 (granted I was six and mostly I remember pictures of myself bundled up like international cargo prepped for a several thousand mile journey)! In that particular storm the city got 22" in 24 hours. Everything ground to a halt. No bus service...trains....nothing. It was glorious for a kid. Overnight I'd suddenly been invited to compete in the winter Olympics! Bobsleds, ice skating, hockey, alpine skiing! (It was Chicago after so there are no mountains, we improvised and used garage roofs instead...Rudy broke his arm! We laughed).

 

We had another one in '79 (not quite as bad as '67 but it lost Mayor Bilandic his job since he forgot to plow the streets).

 

That was the norm. Brutal winters every year. Some years more hellish that others but most hard and difficult to endure.

 

Here's the kick though. Schools didn't close. Maybe that day...but they were open the next. And they never closed because it was 'COLD'? C'mon. What are we teaching these kids? Oooo, it's cold. Can't work today. Cold. Can't work tomorrow either, supposed to rain.

 

Kids now.....jeez...they gotta wear helmets when they're out riding bikes! Really? When I was a kid people used to put the baby on the back window deck of the Buick Electra 225 and cram all the kids in the back seat! Seatbelts?

 

C'mon!!

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FYI this clip is not hyperbole. There isn't enough silliness in the universe to allow for actual hyperbole. And I walked a mile to school in 0 F more than once back in the day.

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uphill. both ways. in a snow storm. without socks. or gloves.

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  • 3 weeks later...

You remind me that I saw a stylin' young man the other day, wearing a multi-colored polka dot shirt, and all I could think of was Wonder Bread.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I guess my computer didn't want me to complain - because I lost the page and my typing disappeared.

 

I remember the Blizzard of '78 and the Ice storm of '79 in Connecticut.

 

What ever is going on this year seems like a bunch of years together.

 

I hope the spring thaw comes gently without much flooding. It's a whacky world we live in!

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